Return To Me
by crazyanimelover98
Summary: At last the Shredder is defeated, but at a price. During the battle the turtles fall as well leaving Splinter to await their return. 20 years pass and the boys are reborn as humans from different households. However, their enemy has returned with them, intent on finishing what was started in their past lives. Human! TMNT. Turtlecest(?) other warnings inside.
1. Prologue: My only wish

**Author's note: Hey guys! I'm back XD Okay some things you need to know about this story: Shredder is just a really really evil human in the story okay? That's the only way I could get this to work out so please don't hate me. This is a turtlecest story...of a sorts (Can I still call it that even though they aren't turtles anymore?!) The pairings include Raph/Leo and Mikey/Donnie. I also feel compelled to warm you that there is going to be physical and sexual abuse as well as bullying and neglect. Note there may also be a rape that isn't done with the sexual abuse but that is still being debated.** **But there will definitely be some sexy times between the boys! If any of this bothers you, feel free to exit stage right quietly. Any flames I receive will be used to make smores X3** **So I believe that is all, and without any further adui I hope you guys enjoy the prologue, tell me what you think and please take my poll, it is important for this story. Happy reading X3**

**Disclaimer! : I sadly do not own the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles ( T - T )**

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Everything hurt... his entire body felt so heavy that even opening his eyes was too much for him. So he just lay there on his side, still and silent in the darkness. Through the darkness came a new pain, starting in his heart and spreading throughout his entire being. This one seeming to overtake the physical pain entirely, bringing tears to his eyes. Gritting his teeth Leonardo fought to remember what had happened to cause so much hurt that only seemed to swallow him up the more he tried.

Hazy images danced in the blue banded terrapin's mind. His brothers... shit where were his brothers?!

Even as he willed with all his being for his eyes to open Leo only managed to peek through the small crack his eyelids had allowed him. His surroundings just as blurred and hazy as his memories had been. With what came of his sight followed with his other senses as well. It was terrible. The scent of freshly spilled blood and death clogged up his nostrils, making him want to gag. He probably would have if he had the strength. The pain he had felt before only intensified as he became more aware, though Leo only managed a low groan to voice his agony. All throughout his body, the turtle felt cuts, most still seeping out blood. However, those weren't what caught his attention.

Protruding from his plastron Leo could see two, blood caked blades among the shattered scales surrounding them. Their tips gleaming in the moonlight, being the only part of them left untainted by the crimson water as it flows freely through the wound. Seeing this, his eyes widened even if only a little. Gradually, he was able to move his arm up to the blades and weakly gripped at them. Gritting his teeth at the pain, he pulled as hard as he could at them. Sadly it didn't seem to be enough, as neither of the blades budged even an inch. The events from only moments ago returning to him.

The time had come at long last. Tonight was the night Leonardo and his brothers had agreed that they would end the Shredder's reign of terror once and for all, and avenge Splinter's Master Yoshi. They had fought their way into Shredder's headquarters, fought more foot ninjas than he had bothered to count and then... nothing. All he could remember next was charging at the one who had proved himself the very embodiment of evil. Yet the hurt inside spiked again, stronger than before. Leo could also remember feeling unbridled rage surging through his veins as the pain was doing now. Why he was so angry, he couldn't recall.

More images flashed in his mind's eye. He could see the Shredder blocking his rage-fueled attacks with both his katanas. He watched as his scenes were returned to him in shock of seeing and feeling the two blades that had always rested on the Shredder's gauntlets embedded themselves into the front of Leo's shell and pierced his chest. Looking around himself now, he could see that most of the blood he was smelling came from the puddle of his own blood he was laying in. How long had he laid here?

Another image glimmered in Leo's mind. He saw himself separating the blades from their master with a swift and powerful turn of his body. Thinking back on it now, he noted the move may have been the reason he was bleeding so terribly now. Finally, the terrapin saw himself slice the Shredder's head clean off, ending the life of their enemy and the battle as well. After that he remembered falling and waking up as he was now. So where were his brothers?

With great difficulty, due to what he knew now to be blood loss, Leo sluggishly managed to prop himself up with both arms to look around. Sure enough, the Shredder's body lay a few feet away from him, his head in it's own surrounding pool of blood. So where…

Dark brown eyes looked around desperately only to land on a sight he'd rather have missed. There his brother's were, in the center of the room. Donnie and Mikey were the first ones Leo saw. A peaceful if not slightly pained expression on his youngest brother's innocent face. Mikey's baby blue eyes now glazed over by death, yet even so a small smile lay on his face. Donnie lay over Mikey's body, covering the youngest so completely that if Leo had been laying in any other direction he wouldn't have seen Mikey at all. Dried tear stains on Donnie's brown-green cheeks told him little Mikey had died first. By the numerous swords sticking out of his back... Donnie had been trying to protect their little brother's body.

Tears finally made their way down the oldest turtle's face. He'd failed them... the pain in his heart made sense now. His two youngest brothers were gone. He'd failed his job to protect them. And if they were gone, does that mean Raph was…?

Looking around once more a choked sob escaped Leo's lips as he laid eyes on the red banded terrapin. Out of all three of his brothers. it was obvious that Raphael had taken the most hits before finally falling. Not an inch of his body was spared from the bruises and lacerations that marred the darkest turtle's skin. A new, fresher wave of pain coursed through Leonardo's body at the sight of his mate in such a state. To see Raphael, _**his**_ Raphael beaten, battered, cold, and dead not too far from where he lay.

Summoning up what remained of his strength, Leonardo dragged himself to the place his mate lay still, never to open his beautiful golden eyes again. Every movement only caused his body more misery. Leo's aching limbs begging him to stop, to slip back into the darkness. Still he dragged himself sluggishly, inch by inch to his lover's body leaving a trail of blood in his wake.

When, at long last he'd reached Raph's corpse, Leonardo's body collapsed on the ground beside him. Only capable of feebly taking his brother's hand into his own as his vision grew blurry once more.

'Why had it come to this?' he thought as he looked into the forever closed eyes of his love. What had they done to deserve such an end? Was it because of their love? Was their feelings for each other so wrong that they deserved such a terrible fate as retribution for their sin?

'Tch, screw fate,' Leonardo thought as he felt his eyes begin to close, 'If that's the reason for all this then so be it. I don't regret any of it. Though... I do have one wish,' A few more tears escaped his closed lids and fell sluggishly down his cheeks. 'My last and only wish… let's all meet up again. If we're ever reborn, I hope in my next life… we could all… be together again. Yeah… I'd like that.' With that final thought, the oldest turtle's breathing stilled and Leonardo followed his younger brother's in death.

But it was not the end…

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**A/N: Hey! Me again. Once again I ask that you tell me what you thought of the first chapie and that you take the poll on my profile. Thank you and I hope you enjoyed the story :3  
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	2. Chapter 1: Welcome To My Life

**A/N: Hey guys, I'm so so sorry it took a little longer to post this than I expected. Because I was so lazy while posting How It's Supposed To Be, I've decided to be a bit harder on my self and strive to make a post every Sunday. As you can see I'm a bit late, this is because, in reality, my betas and I have lives outside of fanfiction that we have to attend to. However, if all goes well the next chappie should be posted soon so fingers crossed XD. So without further adiu I hope you guys like this chapter :3 Also a bit of a side note, because only two people took the poll concerning the guy's names I had to take matters in my own hands so if you don't like it then oh well, you should have voted.  
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**Disclaimer!: I do not own the teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles...it would be a very different franchise if I did...**

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**_You don't know what it's like_**

**_To be like me_**

**_To be hurt_**

**_To feel lost_**

**_To be left out in the dark_**

**_To be kicked when you're down_**

**_To feel like you've been pushed around_**

**_To be on the edge of breaking down_**

**_And no one's there to save you_**

**_No, you don't know what it's like_**

**_Welcome to my life_**

**_~Simple Plan: "Welcome to my Life"_**

There is a point in every teenager's life that they just have to stop and say "I hate my life." Rarely do they actually mean it when they say these words. Most of the time it is said as a sarcastic exaggeration to a friend or even to themselves out of frustration. On the few occasions the person actually does mean it, it is usually a temporary thing triggered by a small problem that was relatively easy to fix or get over. Once it was fixed, the teen would then forget the feeling until the next problem arose. Such is the way of a normal teenager. Sadly…Donnie was not a normal teenager.

Sure being one of if not the most technically and chemically savvy kids in the school with a natural love and comprehension of science had it's perks. His teachers adored him, especially his science teachers; though some grew jealous and bitter towards the student who corrected them on more than one occasion in the same class. He was allowed in both the library and the science lab to do some experimenting of his own nearly whenever he wanted to, save only for testing days. He still went to his classes most of the time, which made his teachers respect him even more. Grades were obviously never an issue for him, never getting lower than a 95% on just about any assignment. However the perks stop directly at adults in the school.

Ever since Donnie could remember he had been picked on by other students because of his slightly above average intelligence. It started in kindergarten where at the age of five he had already started reading and writing far better than the other children in his class. However, while his teacher had praised him, the students had made fun of him. At first they had called him names like "freak" and "weirdo" among other childish names. Not long after the name calling started, the boys in his class would push him and hit him during recess time. He had tried to tell his parents and even some of his teachers, but they dismissed it as "playful rough housing" and did nothing. This behavior stuck with him all the way into fifth grade. Though the names calling had gotten worse and the pushing turned to shoving as the hitting turned to punching, Donnie managed. He'd grown used to it by then. Used to sitting alone at recess and hiding so he could read in peace, used to never having a partner in any of his classes save for the few who were forced to pair with him and made him do all the work. Sure he felt lonely, but he could deal with it. It was what he had grown accustomed to over the years.

At the end of fifth grade, on the last day of school, he had received a note stating that instead of spending another year in elementary Donnie was to go straight to middle school. From here things only got worse. The bullying got so bad that no one wanted to talk to him for fear of being treated just as badly. Thus he threw himself into experimenting and even more reading, but still he couldn't fill the emptiness he felt inside. When he entered high school, the feeling of loneliness only grew, nearly swallowing him up completely. For two years he sat alone in all of his classes and at lunch every day. He heard nothing said to him by the other students unless they were harsh insults, and never had any kind of physical interaction with another student unless they were beating him up behind the teacher's back during passing time and lunch period. His life went on like this all the way up until junior year. Until the day he met Raph.

The day had started out normal enough. Everyone had scattered around the school for lunch. Donnie had been on his way to the library when he was suddenly grabbed by a three classmate bullies and dragged into the nearest boy's bathroom. Two of them gripped his lean arms and held him against the wall while the third, obviously the pitiful rabble's leader, smirked at him. Donnie just rolled his chocolate brown eyes at this, "What do you want now Jason? I already got your math homework back to you this morning."

The chubby boy simply grins maliciously. "Nah, nothing like that today freak. I just need a little stress relief is all." Before Donnie could reply Jason drew his arm back and lodged his fist into the smaller boy's gut, knocking the air right out of him with a whoosh. Instinct telling him to curl around the hurt area, but he could only slump over a little bit. The other two boys being the only things holding him up now as he tries to find his breath again. Damn it, he hated days like this.

Jason laughs cruelly and grips Donnie's light brown hair tightly, using it to lift the younger's head with a sharp jerk. "Oh come on now, don't give in so soon! You know I like it when you struggle." With that he draws his arm back again aiming for a blow to Donnie's face when he is stopped by a strong, tanned hand on his wrist mere centimeters before his fist makes it's mark.

At first there is a look of confusion on Jason's face but that quickly gives way to anger. With a growl he snaps his attention to the intruding stranger, "Hey what's the big-!" He stops himself when he is met with blazing amber eyes; dangerous looking amber eyes that are definitely glaring back at him. The rest of him wasn't looking so friendly either. The boy's red hair had many strands curved, reaching up like fire; his black tank top stretched across his large frame showing his muscle, which he definitely had plenty of.

"Sheesh, guy can't even take a piss in peace eh?" the boy says his in a rough accent that could only come from Brooklyn, making it sound more like a growl. Regaining his composure Jason glared at the redhead as he tugged his arm out of the other's hold, "Mind your own business pretty boy or you're next." He regretted his words almost immediately as he saw the boy's eyes glinted with a strange light, one of acceptance as if he had been issued a challenge.

With a smirk the boy raised his hands into the air, palms up in surrender and took a step backwards. Next thing the other boys saw was Jason flying into the nearest stall with a loud, echoing crash as the boy gave him a powerful left hook to the jaw. Then he walked to where Jason lay with a calm slow stride and picked him up by the collar of his shirt. "You know I really hate dick heads like you who pick fights on people who obviously don't gotta chance. You know I've got a pretty strong stomach, myself, but people like you make me sick enough to blow chunks," with that he grips Jason's hair tightly and dunks it into the toilet bowl. "But hey, Imma nice guy, and I'm sure you learned your lesson, yeah?" The bully can only nod, his eyes wide with fear. The red headed boy's lips curl in disgust as he tossed the defeated bully out of the stall.

As soon as he hits the bathroom floor, Jason quickly gets up and scrambles away. With a satisfied smirk the golden eyed teen then turns to the other two, who are still holding Donnie, but their grip was tighter than before and now they had a slight tremble in their legs. Donnie, on the other hand, only starred in slight awe and confusion. The boy watched the other two, eyebrow arched expectantly, "What? You guys expecting a goodie bag? Get outta here already!" he barked sharply. They blinked at the boy then shared a look among themselves. With a nod to each other they ran after Jason, asking him to wait up.

Don just stood there, against the wall. He couldn't believe it…had that really just…happened?

"You…you stopped them. Saved me...but why would you-"

"Hey," the boy interrupted, "don't you go thinkin' I did any of that for you. It's just…I don't like bullies is all."

Despite the boy's words, Don found himself smiling. The first true smile he'd given in a very long time. This guy wasn't so bad. Sure he could flatted Donnie like a freaking soda can, but he didn't seem like the type to hurt you for no reason. He couldn't explain how, he just knew. Stretching out his hand he beamed, "Yeah well thanks anyway. I'm Donnie."

His savior eyed the hand wearily, which Donnie had to admit was a bit odd but he chose not to question it for now. A few silent and admittedly awkward seconds later the boy looks down at his own hands, "Raphael. Uh, you could just call me Raph. Um, nice to meet yah," and decides to give a mock salute.

Don chuckles a bit at this, "You new?"

Raph shrugs with a playful lopsided smirk, "What gave me away?"

Don shakes his head and smiles, "I just don't remember seeing you around is all. You make too big an introduction to miss."

Raph nods in acknowledgment, "Point taken. Now could yah get outta here already? I really gotta piss."

Ever since that day Donnie and Raph were pretty much glued to each other's sides. Raph was still rather moody, but he kept the bullies away well enough. He also seemed interested in Donnie's work, though he seemed to favor the ones that blew up more than anything. Donnie had also gotten the privilege of meeting Raph's younger brother. Well to be honest, Mikey had nearly run him over.


	3. Chapter 2: I Know You

**A/N: Hey guys. Just a heads up, it is still only 10:45pm where I am now so the deadline has still been met as it is still technically Sunday so...yay me XD. Anyway here you go, I hope you guys like it and the next chapter should be out in a week if all goes well so enjoy :3**

**DISCLAIMER!: I do not own any of the ninja turtles (T-T)**

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_**I know you,**_

_**I walked with you once upon a dream.**_

_**I know you,**_

_**That gleam in your eyes is so familiar a gleam.**_

_**I know its true,**_

_**That visions are seldom all they seem.**_

_**But if i know you,**_

_**I know what you'll do;**_

_**You'll love me at once,**_

_**The way you did once upon a dream.**_

_**~Emily Osment: "Once Upon A Dream"**_

It was about a week after Raph had saved him from Jason in the bathroom. Donnie and Raph were talking a bit in the hallway before classes started when out of nowhere there was an exuberant shout, which sounded vaguely like "Dude!"

The next thing Donnie knew he was on the ground with a terrible ache in the back of his head and an adorable blond teenage boy sitting on top of him! The new boy's eyes were shut tightly in obvious discomfort as he tenderly rubbed his bum, the back of the boy's hand lightly brushed his thigh. Donnie blushed brightly, not sure what to do or say at the moment and could only manage to stutter a quiet apology like an idiot.

After a few seconds the blond opened his beautiful baby blue eyes and Don felt his heart soar, and his stomach tie itself in knots. What the hell? Who was this boy, and what was he doing to him? The boy looked down at him confused for a moment before a wide grin split his freckled face and a small, cheerful giggle escaped his lips. Donnie felt there was something off about that smile, but he couldn't pin down what it was. But damn if that giggle wasn't the cutest thing he'd ever heard.

"Dude, you should see your face right now," the adorable blond chuckled merrily. Donnie only felt his cheeks grow warmer as his blush deepened and he quickly looked away, trying to hide his embarrassment behind his long bangs.

This of course only caused the blond to snicker more until he was lifted up by the back of his shirt, not unlike a kitten. The boy's body stiffened tensely, the smile slipped off his face. A look of terror contorted his features, and fear caused his eyes to widen as he quickly looked over his shoulder to face his captor. Raph studied him with mixed expression of concern and reprehension. "I finally make a friend and you try to flatten him. Not a very nice way to treat your big brother's friends, Mike," Raph growled softly, giving him a light shake.

Mikey visibly relaxed at the sight of his big brother, and pouted childishly. "You know what else isn't very nice? Sneaking up on people, you big jerk," he muttered.

Raph smiled affectionately at this his amber eyes seeming to lose their dangerous light for a moment and set Mikey down gently, "Hey don't you go lecturing me. I'm the oldest here, that's my job. Now go apologize to Donnie for trying to flatten him," Raph ordered.

Mikey looked over at the aforementioned boy to find him still on the floor where he left him before. Walking over to him he held out his hand and smiled sheepishly, "Sorry about that dude. My brother is always telling me to pay more attention or I'd end up hurting someone. Who knew he could be right sometimes!"

Donnie chuckled softly at the clear look of irritation the blonde's words put on Raph's face and took Mikey's extended hand into his own.

Their eyes widened when they gripped the other's hand, and felt a tingling shock ripple through the other. Letting go immediately in surprise, both boys looked over their hands puzzled by the sensation. Looking up at each other at the same moment, brown was once again met by baby blue. The two of them searching for an answer they knew lay buried deep beneath the other's eyes.

Something long lost, but needed desperately to be found. Something fuzzy lay on the surface, so close but still too far to recall. Like a memory from a dream. Donnie was the first one to shake off the trance-like state Mikey's touch had left him in. With a nervous chuckle he lifted the hand to rub the back of his neck as he stood on his own. "Don't worry about it. I should have been paying more attention to my…wait brother?!"

Mikey's grin returned full force as he wrapped an arm around Raph's broad shoulders. "That's right! My name's Michael, but you can just call me Mikey, everyone else does." Turning to the red head who was currently glaring daggers at the offending arm Mikey gave him a kicked puppy stare accompanied with a pouty bottom lip. "I'm heart you haven't told your new friend about me brother dearest. Are you so embarrassed of me you would try to make it as though I wasn't in your life?"

Raph only rolled his amber eyes, seeming to be immune to the cuteness that Don was sure would be the end of him, and roughly shrugged off Mikey's arm. "More like sparing him from that annoying little motor mouth of yours. Dear little brother," Raph grumbled playfully.

Mikey's pout took a more realistic and playful turn, "How could you say that?! He's practically basking in the ray of sunshine that is me!" He turns to smile at an amused looking Donnie, "Right?"

Donnie chuckles softly, "I'm not sure about all of that, though you are very amusing."

Raph sighs and shrugs, "Alright, just remember you brought the talking tornado that is Mikey on yourself."

Donnie shrugged as well, "I don't mind, the more the merrier as they say."

Mikey cheered and hugged Don tightly, causing him to blush faintly, "Alright! Finally someone fun to hang out with!" He let go and tilted his head curiously, "So…who are you?"

Don smiles at the little energetic blond, "Donald, but please I prefer Donnie or Don."

That was a little over a year ago now and even now with two of them as seniors they all still hung out around the school. They never saw each other outside of school though, something about Raph and Mikey's dad being rather strict and overprotective, but still they managed to keep in touch with Donnie during weekends and pretty much all of summer vacation.

For some reason Raph didn't like actually talking on the phone. He preferred to text instead, but hey who was Donnie to complain now that he actually had someone to talk with?

Meanwhile Mikey wouldn't shut up. Donnie's phone history consisted of hours of talking to the little energetic blond. For the first time since he could recall Don actually felt…happy.

He felt that deep lingering sense of loneliness ebbing way. However it was still there, nagging him in the back of his mind, making him feel almost like he forgot something. Something important, and if there was one thing that upset the young genius more that bullies or failed experiments it was the feeling that he forgot something. He didn't mention any of this to Raph or Mikey of course. Why bother them more than he has too? Besides he was sure it was just him being paranoid.

Though what the little genius didn't know, was that his best friends were feeling the exact same way.

Meanwhile a boy found himself glancing at the odd group of three, not for the first time, as another school day ended. An odd but familiar feeling of longing and nostalgia rising once again into his being; though his stormy gray eyes gave no such feelings away. Shaking his head of ebony hair softly he exited the school, he couldn't afford to be late for his first job of the night again.


	4. Chapter 3: Airplanes

**A/N: Hello my lovelies X3 I know I said I was gonna post on Sunday, however I forgot about a camping trip I'm going on this weekend soo...Happy Unbirthday everybody XD And look! I even made the chappie nice and long for you guys. So yeah I hope you guys like it and...I'll see you guys next chappie.**

**Disclaimer!: I do not own TMNT**

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_Can we pretend that ,_

_airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars?_

_I could really use a wish right now._

_~B.O.B. (ft. Hayley Williams): "Airplanes"_

Life was not fair. This is a fact everyone comes to realize at least once in their life time. Some find out without even realizing it. Most of the time we learn it as children, when an event happens that we don't exactly agree with we say "that's not fair." Of course we don't truly understand the meaning of this when we say it, we just hope saying it will reverse the event so that it will turn to what we want to call fair. Sadly it never does and as we grow older the lesson is engraved into our minds again and again. Life is not fair. The lesson everyone must learn at some point in their lives. It is a lesson Leonardo learned far too early in his life.

He had a happy childhood. To date the span of his life from infancy to the age of five was the happiest he could ever recall being. Ironically it is the time period he could remember the least of. One thing he never remembered doing in that time, was cry. Leo was sure he did at some point, like all young children do, but he couldn't recall doing so. What he did remember was smiling and laughing. He could remember the sun behind the image of a woman that could only be his mother; though he no longer was able to recall what her face looked like, he could remember the scent of cherry blossoms. Even now, it remains his favorite smell in the world. He could also hear his father's laughter. A comforting sound, deep, but light all at once. He remembered feeling a sense of security around his father, like no harm would be able to come to him if his father was around. But he wasn't around, not anymore. Neither of them were.

Leo could remember how he'd found them that night. Having woken up from a bad dream, the little five year old had gone to seek comfort from the only two people he loved in the world. He wasn't surprised that the door was open. They always left it open for him for nights like that one where he got scared and wanted to sleep in his parents' loving embrace. But the smell…the foul smell that was unlike anything the child had smelled before. It was powerful he had to take a step back and clench his nose tightly shut with his small hand. He'd then called for his parents, but no answer came. Curiosity and the now desperate need for his mommy and daddy drove the little Leo into the room. Daddy probably passed gas…yeah that was it, and they had both probably worked hard today and hadn't heard him.

The room was dark, again nothing new. He was used to navigating his way through it with little to no light. What stopped him was the puddle he stepped in. Well, actually he slipped and fallen into it on the way to his parents' bed.

In order to catch himself, Leo was forced to let go of his nose, both of his small hands landing in the oddly warm puddle. He felt the liquid splatter all over his body, specks of it hitting his face and mouth. The water's strange tang contorting his face into one of disgust as he tried to spit it out. The irony smell didn't help matters either, it only seemed to add to the terrible smell that had grown stronger now that he was further into the room. Reaching up to where he knew the bed would be, trying to help himself up out of the warm sticky mess; Leo gave a soft sigh of relief when he felt the slim, reassuring fingers of his mother's hand. But something was wrong, she was so cold. That meant daddy was probably hogging all the blankets again. Leo giggled softly to himself at the thought and tugged at her arm a little. He was too short to get on the bed by himself.

When she didn't move, the raven haired boy furrowed his dark brows together in confusion. Why wasn't she waking up? Daddy wasn't snoring so they can't be that sleepy...could they?

Tugging a little harder on his mothers freezing, limp arm Leo tried calling out to her, softly at first, but when no response came the boy's voice rose to a desperate plea. Finally, not knowing what else to try, he made his way over to the light switch only to trip again, this time on something cold and stiff. Shaking it off he got up again and turned on the light. What he saw would haunt him forever, in both his dreams and his every waking moment.

_"Sir?"_

His parents, the red...everything was so red

_"Excuse me, sir?"_

...and her eyes...oh god his mother's eyes!

**_"Leo!"_**

Wide gray eyes searched frantically over their surroundings in a panic. He could hear his heartbeat, feel it quicken as it seemed to pound through his ears. Where was he?! This wasn't his house! Where was mommy and...oh. Oh right...they weren't...

"Damn it Leonardo snap out of it!"

The raven haired teen suddenly became aware that there was a man in front of him. Admittedly not a very tall man, he stood about a head shorter than Leo, but was also looking very angry. Glancing around he began to recognize that he was in a diner. Standing to the right of the little angry man was a group of girls, looking to be around his age, in a booth that seemed rather concerned and anxious.

The tension began to seep from his being as it all came back to him. His entire stance relaxed as the fists he didn't know he was making unclenched. That's right he worked here and the short man was his boss...

Fuck he worked here and the short man was his boss!

Getting his emotions back into gear, Leo took a deep breath to calm himself and bowed at the waist in the direction of the girls. "My deepest apologies ladies," standing back up he gave them a small smile, "I didn't mean to startle you. Please rest assured I'm alright. Is there anything I can get you?"

The manager gave Leo a stern look that practically screamed _'we'll talk later'_ before walking back to his usual spot in his office.

One of the girls, a strawberry blond with her long hair up in a ponytail, watched Leo with worried blue eyes. "Are you sure you're okay?" He smiled softly at her, "What's your name?" Despite the not-so hushed whispers of her friends to not answer that, she smiled back and said, "Shadow, Shadow Jones." Leo nods, "That's a nice name, very unique. Well Shadow, I assure you there is nothing to worry about. I am perfectly fine and I thank you for your concern. Now what can I get for you girls?"

After that things went by normally. The girls made their orders and received their food. They talked and ate, paid their bill and gave a generous tip before leaving. Shadow smiled at Leo and waved at him before leaving with her friends. Soon after, Leonardo found himself having a less than pleasant talk with his boss.

"Damn it Leonardo! That was the second time this week you've zoned out in the middle of an order, making it the fifth time this month! On top of which you have arrived late to work three times already!" The manager shouted furiously. Leo lowered his head and bowed slightly. "Yes sir I understand. Please understand that it isn't intentional. I'm doing the best I can with school and-"

"Then do better! If you keep this up much longer you'll scare away all my customers!" The man sits back in his seat and lights a cigarette. Leo resists the urge to wrinkle his nose in disgust and keeps his expression blank, dutiful. After a couple of puffs the man sighs, his expression softening slightly. "We can't keep doing this Leonardo. If this keeps up, I'm going to have to let you go."

Leo's body stiffens and his hands close into fists, but his expression stays the same as he rights himself to a standing position once more. "Understood sir, it won't happen again."

The manager huffs once more and nods, "Good. Now get out of here and go back to work." Leo nods and bows once more before walking out of the man's office. He'd have to look around for another job at this rate…damn it.

When his shift ended, Leo quickly changed out of his uniform for the diner and into the one for the grocery store down the road. All but running the entire way there, he managed to make it on time. Going to his usual place behind a cash register he began his second job as a check-out boy. His time here went by rather uneventfully, which came as a relief to him. However he did enjoy talking to a regular to the store. A red headed woman named April. She was kind, and rather nice to talk to in his otherwise dull job. She always made sure to stop by the checkout stand he was working at, which he appreciated greatly.

Today she was accompanied by none other than that girl from the diner just a few hours earlier, Shadow. The blond girl broke out into a pleasant smile as they stepped up to place their things on the conveyor belt. "Hey, you're the guy from the diner!" Leo chuckled softly at this and waved, "Nice to see you again. I didn't know you had kids April." The woman smiled at this and rubbed Shadow's shoulder affectionately, "Just this one. Though she and Casey are handfuls enough on their own so there really is no need for another one." Leo laughs softly as he finished ringing up their things. "I'll bet. You take care, all of you okay?" April nods and grabs a couple bags, leaving the others for Shadow to carry, "Sure-thing. You take care of yourself as well Leo!" He smiles and waves softly after them before turning back to the other customers.

At the end of the day, when Leo finally made it back to his one bedroom apartment, he put on some ramen noodles and worked dutifully on his homework as he ate. When he had finally finished he looked up at the clock and saw that it read 11:30pm With a sigh he washed up his bowl, trudged tiredly to his room, and crawled into bed; not bothering to change out of his uniform or even slip under the covers. He reached over to set his alarm for 5am and glanced out the window just above the head of the bed. The sky was dark, but still the city outside did not sleep. As his eyes slipped shut he saw an airplane fly high above the buildings and sighed.

He could manage this life. He'd survive working like this forever if he had to…but he didn't know how much longer he could take this feeling of loneliness that was driving him insane with yearning. An image of the three boys he'd seen around school flashed through his mind and his heart clenched painfully. Leo chose to chalk it up to wishing he had what they did. The three of them looked so close and happy together…

Slowly the black arms of sleep, circled his mind, blocking out all other thought but one as Leonardo slipped into unconsciousness. The one thought that seemed always constant, the one that never left. Stuck with him for years after the death of his parents. As sleep took him Leo thought as a single tear slipped down his pale cheek:

_I don't want to be alone anymore._


	5. Chapter 4: Tears Of An Angel

**_A/N: Hey guys. I'm sorry this took a bit of time to post. My beta said it was good to go a couple days ago, I just don't like to post unless I have some of, if not most of the next chapter done sooo...yeah. Again, sorry about that. On another note, school starts on the 20th for me so it may take even longer for me to post chapters than it does now. I ask that you please stay with me and be patient. While I can't promise anything I will do my best to send new chapters out either once a week or every other week. I thank all of you guys who have stuck with this and hope to see you all at the very end :3_**

**_P.S. You guys remember all those warnings I gave in the Author's Note in the very first chapter? Well this chapter is why. So...consider yourself warned :3 With all that out of the way I hope you guys don't hate me by the end of this thing _**(-_-')

* * *

_Cover my eyes,_

_Cover my ears._

_Tell me these words are a lie._

_It can't be true,_

_That I'm losing you._

_Sun cannot fall from the sky._

_Can you hear heaven cry,_

_The tears of an angel._

_~RyanDan_

"You're pathetic."

The man landed a punch that sent the teen sprawling to the ground. He then lands a swift kick to the teens stomach effectively leaving him gasping like a fish out of water. The man growls and tightly grips the boy's fiery red hair, using it to lift his whole body off the floor only to toss him into the living room wall.

"You're weak."

Raph lay with his back against the wall, his eyes shut tightly. He panted breathlessly through pain gritted teeth as he curled his body into itself. His father scoffed and sauntered over to where his oldest son lay.

"It's no wonder you don't have any friends."

He stood over his son's still body and smirks.

"I mean look at you! You're such a useless little piece of shit you'd cower from an old man like me."

He swings his leg back and kicks Raph again, much harder than before. Though because of Raph's current position it only manages to hit his legs.

"Nobody wants you," he kicks again, "nobody cares about you! If you disappeared one day no one would notice. There isn't one person who would miss your miserable existence or even acknowledge your absence."

"You're wrong!"

Raph knew he made a mistake as soon as the kicks stopped coming. He couldn't believe he just said that! Crap, he regretted the words as soon as they left his mouth. His body tensed and he bit his lip as he waited for the next blow to come. His father just stood over him and watched him.

His face held no emotion, but in his eyes his rage flourished unabashedly. His large hands twitched, as his head tilted. The man's green eyes narrowing dangerously.

"What did you say?" He growled viciously.

Taking ahold of Raphael's red hair once again he lifted the teen up and shoved him into the wall. His grip not allowing the boy any movement, and his other arm blocked any other escape. Raph looked back at him with wide eyes. The golden pools reflecting his fear for what he knew was coming next.

When no answer came, the man seemed to only grow angrier. He slammed his fist into Raph's already bruised stomach. Then he swiftly brought it up to the boys face. The force of the blow snapping his head to the left causing a few strands of hair to be torn from his head by his father's grip, still sturdy as ever.

"What the fuck did you just say to me boy?!"

Raph looked up at the man again. His breath more ragged and tired sounding than before. Dark red blood dribbled down from his mouth, trailing down to his chin. His amber eyes hooded by his eyelids. He found himself staring at his brother.

Little Mikey was curled up on the couch, sitting as far from the two of them as it would allow. His large baby blue eyes were glistening with tears even as the spilled over and down his freckled cheeks. They met Raph's gaze looking sorrowful, worried, and utterly terrified all at once. A spark flared inside of him and without letting his eyes leave his brother he said again, very quietly;

"You're wrong."

Their father's eyes narrowed further, through gritted teeth he growled, "Why you little fucker!" Pulling back his arm to throw another punch he felt two smaller arms wrap around his. Glaring down at his youngest son he rumbled, "Stay out of this Michael."

Still Mikey stood his ground, his wide pleading eyes looking into the angry and annoyed one of his father. With a quiet sniff and a hiccup and nuzzled the older man's arm and whispered desperately, "Please…please stop. No more tonight…please."

The man looked into Mikey's eyes for what felt like forever for all three of them. Then the man scoffed and shook the youngest off his arm before tossing Raph to the ground. Turning his full attention to Mikey his eyes spoke of a secret and dark promise.

"We'll talk about this later Michael."

Lowering his eyes to stare at the floor, Mikey nodded, "Yes sir."

Feeling satisfied the man nodded and walked in the direction of his room. When the sound of their father's door slamming rang through the house Mikey let go of the breath he'd been holding and rushed over to his older brother.

Raph was already trying to stand, wiping the blood from his mouth. Mikey wasted no time helping his older brother up and walking him to the couch. After sitting Raph down, Mikey turned to grab the first aid kit when his brother's hand gripped his arm.

"He didn't leave any cuts Mikey. I'm fine alright," Raph mumbled giving his brother what was supposed to be a reassuring smile. However it only managed to look tired and fake.

Saddened baby blue eyes looked over Raph's beaten and battered form. Mikey's small, soft hand gently rubbed the darkening angry looking bruise that was forming on his brother's right cheek.

"That's gonna be a hard one to explain to Donnie," Mikey said quietly, almost to himself.

Raph winced and carefully wiped the hand away. "We'll think ah somethin'," he said, the tone of his voice lower than normal. Weaker even. Mikey hated seeing his older brother like this. Hated seeing him so...broken, defeated. It just wasn't Raph.

Looking down at his hands, Mikey sat beside Raph. "Maybe...maybe we shouldn't," he said quietly.

Raph glanced at his little brother, a confused expression on his face. "What are you talking about?"

Mikey bit his bottom lip softly and lowered his head even more, hiding behind his blond curls. "What if we told him? Tell him what dad does to you?" He looks up at the now blank face of his brother with wet pleading eyes. "You said dad was wrong. You said we have someone who cares. Donnie...Donnie's our friend. He'll understand, he'll help us."

Raph continued to stare at Mikey with no expression on his face. His eyes, however, they held something mikey hadn't seen in them for what seemed like ever. He saw a small glimmer of hope deep in his older brother's amber pools. Suddenly his mind was set on nothing but helping that little spark grow. He had to, if not for Raph...then for himself.

Turning to fully face Raph, Mikey gently gripped his muscled arm. "We could get out of here Raph. He'd let us stay with him, I know he would! We could actually have a real family. Just like we always talked about. Come on, whatta you say?"

Mikey watched with growing excitement as his brother's eyes seemed to brighten. A real family. Raph's breathing seemed to stagger at the thought. Was it really possible? After everything they'd...

_"You're pathetic."_

His father's words rang through his mind.

_"You're weak."_

Word after word they seemed to beat him further and further down into the dark.

_"You'd never make it without me."_

Not just words from that night, but all of them. Baring down on him, suffocating him.

_"Nobody wants you."_

All his old wounds hurt. His scars began to burn.

_"Who could ever love something as pitiful as you?"_

Just like that Mikey watch the hope drain out of Raph's gaze as he looked away. His brother's golden eyes turning cold and shielded once again. His hands clenched into fists as he shrugged off his little brother's touch.

"Don't be stupid Mikey. Donnie may be our friend, but we can't drag him into this...not this. In the end of it all, you and I are all we got little brother."

Mikey couldn't look at his brother anymore. He couldn't take that look of defeat any longer, so he looked back down. Shutting his eyes tightly, Mikey felt his nails dig painfully into his palm but he didn't care. It wasn't fair. What had they done to deserve a life like this? How could they even call this a life?!

The blond hadn't even realise he'd been crying until Raphael pulled him into a tight hug and started wiping away his tears. "Hey, what's with the water works all of a sudden?"

Mikey sniffled and looked up at Raph. The red head held his gaze with a soft and gentle smile.

"There's no reason for you tah cry Mikey. I gotcha, and I ain't lettin' nobody hurt you."

"But what about you?" God Mikey hated the way his voice sounded. His voice sounded as wet as his tears. He sounded as broken as Raph looked...he was so pathetic.

The older teen chuckled softly and hugged Mikey closer to him, "What I tell ya bout doin' my job? I'm the oldest, I'm supposed to be the one lookin' out for you. Don't worry about me, okay little brother? I'll be fine, hell I've gotten used to it by now, it really aint a big deal." Pulling back a bit to wipe away his brother's fresh tears, Raph kissed Mikey forehead. "Just don't stop smilin' okay? Don't let what's goin' on with me get to yah. A'right?"

Mikey sniffled again then nodded beaming up at his brother; tears still threatening to spill over. "Okay...if you say so." Raph gave a satisfied smile and nodded as well before letting go of Mikey and standing.

"It's late, we ought tah get teh bed."

Mikey nods, and walks with his brother to their shared room. It's not a very big room, but it's got room enough to move around in. A window over the desk that allows them to look out to the street.

"You can have the top bunk tonight," Raph says, already climbing into bed. Mikey lay a hand on his shoulder to stop him. "Nah, you deserve it. Besides I know how much you enjoy being up there." Raph gives his little brother a small smile in thanks before hopping up to the top bunk. Soon he's in a deep sleep, snoring away.

Mikey smiles fondly up at him before looking over at their bedroom door solemnly. Without a word he walks out, shutting the door silently. He then tip-toes to his father's room.

Once he's standing just outside of the man's closed door he takes a deep breath. After a few moments of deep breathing he finally finds the courage to knock.

The door opens, but the only thing to come out of the dark room was his father's large hand as it gripped Mikey's shirt and roughly tugs him into the room. The door quickly is shut behind him, locking with a muffled _click._ The next thing Mikey knows, he's pushed onto what he knew to be his father's bed.

"That was very naughty of you, Michael," his father's voice was lower than before as he slowly made his way to the bed. "You should know better than to get in the way of Raphael's punishments. Now you have to make it up to daddy for being such a bad boy."

Mikey shuddered with a mix of fear and disgust. He knew what that meant. He'd known what he'd be in for the second he begged his father to stop hurting Raph for the night.

At the sound of rustling clothes, Mikey shut his eyes tightly, hoping to block out the situation. When the noise stopped he felt the familiar strong, rough hands roam around his body. Edging his shirt up over his head and setting it aside. It was enough to want to make him want to gag. He'd learned from experience that wasn't the best thing to do though, so instead he gritted his teeth together.

_Take it for big brother. Take it for big brother. Take it for big brother. _

The same mantra replayed over and over in his mind. Though it didn't stop the tears from forming in his eyes for the third time that night as he felt the man pull down his boxer-briefs and toss them aside.

_Take it for big brother._

He held in a sob as he felt the man's lips nipping along his neck. Resisted the almost crippling urge to pull away when the man held Mikey's cock in his large hand and slowly ran his hand up and down it.

_Take it for big brother._

Mikey bit his bottom lip tightly to hold in the tortured scream that threatened to tear his throat apart as he felt his body reluctantly give and get hard. Tears cascaded down his pale, freckled cheeks, but the man...no the monster above him didn't seem to care as he just licked them up with his slimey tongue. Then he stood and for a moment, just for that tiny moment, Mikey had hoped he'd be spared. That tonights torture session was over. But that one, fragile, precious moment was shattered when he was pulled off the bed as well and brought to his knees, face-to-face with his father's large cock.

"You know what to do. Do a good job and I won't touch Raphael tomorrow," the man smirked and tilted Mikey's head up to meet his eyes, "and maybe I'll even make you feel good as well tonight. But," his expression darkened as he tugged Mikey's golden curls, making him whimper, "bite me, or make any sounds at all, and I'll beat him within an inch of his life, and make you watch as he does this the right way. Got it?!"

Mikey gave a shaky nod and whimpered a quiet, "Yes sir."

With a satisfied smile the man let's go of Mikey's hair and the boy reluctantly takes his manhood into his mouth and sucks.

_Take it for big brother._

As he did this he tried his best to close his eyes and imagine he was doing something else, anything else but this. But he was all too aware of his own actions, and the tears seemed unending at this point. When he finally felt the man cum into his mouth he swallowed as he was taught to before he was allowed to shakily pull away.

Above him, his father still stood, only his legs were wobbly now, and he was panting. Mikey flinched when the man caressed his face and grinned lewdly at him.

"Hmm, very good little one. Very good."

Mikey sighed, relaxing a little. It was over, at least for tonight he could-

His thoughts were interrupted as he felt his father toss him into bed again. Wide, frightened blue eyes stared up fearfully at the man before him.

"Now it's your turn," he purred as he once again gripped the blond teen's semi-hard cock and pumped it.

At the end of it all Mikey lay on the bed sobbing into his own hand, covered in his own cum. He felt disgusted with himself. Disgusted in the fact he'd allowed himself to be so weak. That he didn't even fight back anymore.

He felt his father toss a towel on him and the blond went to work cleaning himself up.

"Get your ass in bed," the man mumbled, sounding tired. Mikey nodded and quickly got his clothes back on before all but running out of the room. Once he stood outside his room he didn't dare go inside yet.

He passed it and instead went into the bathroom, looking himself over for any proof of what just happened. When none was found he slid to the floor and cried into his hands.

What would his mother think if she could see him now? Oh god what would Raph or Donnie say? Surely they'd call him sick and disgusting for allowing something like that to happen for years. _Years._ That was why they'd never know.

_"Just don't stop smilin' okay?"_

Taking a few shaky breaths, Mikey stood and wiped away his tears. Glancing into the mirror he noticed what a mess he looked. Fixing himself up, Mikey tried smiling at his reflection, altering it a few times before it finally looked real. Once he was satisfied he walked into his and Raph's room, Raph still asleep, and crawled into bed.

His last thoughts before falling asleep were of Donnie. A tiny smile graced his lips at the thought of the brown-haired nerd. He imagined Donnie holding him, telling him it would be okay.

Mikey knew he had a crush on Donnie. He'd known for a while actually, and he accepted it. He was sure the older boy didn't feel the same way though. How could he? Mikey was a broken nuisance at best. No, he didn't deserve someone as brilliant as Donnie.

The three of them had planned on going out to a little local diner tomorrow after school. Being around the burnet was good enough for him. He couldn't wait for the sun to rise, so he could forget all that happened in the deep and terrible darkness of his home.

* * *

**_A/N: Sooo, haha, there it is. Again, I hope you don't hate me too badly for this. *Hides behind a wall just in case* Hopefully the the next chapter comes out soon. Bye bye my lovelies. _**


	6. Chapter 5: Year Without Rain

**A/N: Hey guys. So...I really have nothing much to say here today. Odd for me, I know. Hm... damn it it doesn't feel right not leaving something here for crying out loud! Oh well, WAIT! Okay I've got it. The next chapter is taking a bit longer to come to me than the others did, so I ask that you please bare with me. If it isn't posted by next week then I'll see that it is posted the week after. So I hope you guys are satisfied with this one for now.  
**

**Disclaimer: I don't own TMNT**

* * *

_**So let this drought come to an end**_

_**And make this desert flower again**_

_**I need you here**_

_**I can't explain**_

_**But a day without you**_

_**Is like a year without rain**_

_**~Selena Gomez; "A Year Without Rain"**_

Leo would be lying if he said he wasn't surprised to see those three boys from school enter the diner the next day. Sure the place was relatively well known, and every once in a while he saw people from school. But he'd never seen those three stop by before, nor did he ever expect to. Actually he couldn't recall seeing them together anywhere except for school. Sure, he'd seen the brown haired guy around every now and then at his store, but that was it.

"-and you're sure you're alright Raph? I mean walking into a light pole hard enough to get that big of a bruise seems highly unlikely for you, and more of a Mikey thing to do," the brunette boy said uncertainly as he entered the diner. To which the blond, most likely the one named Mikey, replied with a whiny, "Hey!"

The usual feeling of longing and nostalgia that always seemed to build in his chest whenever he saw the three of them together flared up inside him once more. However, he was so focused on the three of them that he hadn't noticed his hand gripping his chest to try and quell the ache. What was this...this feeling of loneliness and need that rose up even at the thought of those three?! He'd never really met them, hell he only just learned the little blond boy's name!

The red-haired teen just rolled his eyes- his beautiful and hauntingly familiar golden eyes- at the brunette's concern. "I told yah already Don, I'm fine," he seemed to growl in obvious annoyance, "Now just drop it alright?!"

As Raph turned away to huff, looking more than a little childish with his crossed arms, Leo finally saw the reason for Donnie's anxiety. On the red-head's right cheek lay a dark, angry bruise; just the sight of it made Leo want to wince in pain. He got that from a street light? Leo didn't believe that for a second. His hands clenched into fists, as if angered by the idea of someone hurting Raph. Oh, when he got a hold of that bast- wait...what the hell was he thinking?!

This wasn't any of his business. In fact, he shouldn't even be hearing any of this! Yet here he was, eavesdropping on the group of boys he'd often find himself staring at like an obsessed freak. Nice work Leonardo, great job.

He sighed and tore his gaze from them, his hands relaxing, the feeling of anger ebbing away to a much more familiar one of a deep sadness. It seemed as if his very soul was begging him to turn back to them, to _him_. To hold him close, and be held by- okay okay stop right there!

Leo growled lowly as he rubbed his forehead. Today was already one of _those _days and his shift had only just started. Well he had to admit, the red-head wasn't bad looking. Well-muscled, nice hair, those beautiful golden- damn it stop that!

Just about ready to bash his head repeatedly against the nearest wall, Leo took a deep, calming breath. He'd just been working hard without enough sleep. That was it. Tonight, he'd go home after his shift at the store and just go straight to bed. Yeah, that sounded nice. Besides, it wasn't like he'd actually have to talk to them. What were the odds they'd even sit at a table within his work station?

"Leo, we got a group of three at table seven."

Evidently very high; damn, today was just not his day. The last thing he needed was to have to serve the three people he longed for and at the same time couldn't stand to be around. Taking a moment to school his emotions, he put on a polite smile and made his way over to the table where the other teens sat waiting.

* * *

Today just wasn't Raph's day. Not only was he still unbelievably sore from last night's beating, but Donnie's constant questioning and Mikey being…well Mikey was giving him a headache. It wasn't like this hadn't happened before. Don had seen evidence of their father's abuse many times before. Always in the form of a bruise or new cut somewhere, but he always managed to shrug it off with one lie or another. One day he got jumped, another time he fell down the stairs (original right?), thanks to Mikey he was "attacked by a cat" that was a fun story to tell, and now he hit his face on a stupid street light. Not his best story, he admitted that, but he was running low on things to tell the little brown haired genius that actually seemed believable! The only thing that seemed to sell any of those lies was Raph's tough-guy personality. Despite all that, he knew that Don would eventually catch on to them.

He was, after all, very smart- smart enough to see that both Raph and Mikey were hiding something from him. Maybe Mikey was right. Maybe it would be better to tell their friend before he found out on his own.

Raph shook the thought off as soon as it entered his mind. They couldn't do that to him. They couldn't drag Donnie into their fucked up world. The poor kid already had enough problems of his own without having to help them. Besides, it was almost over.

After he was done with school, Raph had promised himself he'd take his little brother far away from that shit hole they call a home. Still, he did have one small comfort, he was able to keep Mikey safe. As long as their dad was hitting him and not Mikey, he'd manage just fine.

A small smile made its way onto his face. He couldn't help but notice that ever since they'd started hanging out with Donnie, Mikey seemed so much happier. Raph could see how much those two liked each other. It was hard to find one walking around the school without the other close by; despite the fact that they were not only in different classes, but grade levels as well. On a good day Mikey would barge into Raph's room yapping away about their latest phone call. While Donnie, on the other hand, couldn't stop smiling whenever Mikey was around. Which was really nothing new, Mikey did have a rather infectious smile, but Don was always giving Mikey one of _those_ smiles. The kind that say "You're so cute" and "I want to hug you and never let go". Even now that sat abnormally close in the booth they were seated in for two people only calling each other friends and sure enough the little nerd was smiling at Mikey again as he chatted away about something comic book related.

He couldn't help but feel a little envious of those two oblivious teens. Even if they weren't dating yet, it was clear they both cared a great deal for each other. Donnie was a good guy; Raph certainly had no complaints and wasn't about to stand in their way. Hell, he was more likely to smash their heads together to get them to fuckin' kiss already. Still he couldn't help but feel even more alone around the two of them. They both were so happy just to be in each other's company, and Raph would constantly find himself asking, "Why can't I find someone like that?"

Raph was shaken from his silent thoughts by Mikey. "Broooo, your turn to order!" Blinking a couple times, feeling a bit confused, Raph looked up at the waiter who _definitely_ was not standing there before he zoned out.

The waiter looked to be about Raph's age, though he was about a head smaller if he was seeing right. The boy's build was slim, but there was definitely some muscle there as well. His hair was cut short and the most magnificent shade of black he'd ever seen. Most captivating of all were his eyes. The boy's were a whole new shade of gray with a tint of something familiar inside of them. Something he knew all too well. The eyes he saw in the mirror every day were shadows of it. They were the eyes of someone who had seen too much.

His heart both ached and filled with a deep dark rage at the thought. Who could do anything to hurt someone so fucking beautiful so deeply? Something inside of him screamed at him, told him to take the raven haired teen before him into his arms and protect him from all the wrongs in this world.

"Sir?" The dark haired boy asked quietly.

The boy's eyes looked him over worriedly. And his voice- oh god his voice. Raph had to refrain from asking the boy to speak again just for the sake of hearing him.

_Well don't just sit there sayin' nothin' yah damn bone head, speak!_

A light blush colored Raph's bruised cheek and he coughed, shaking all his previous thoughts away.

"Sorry about that, uh…"

The waiter smiled softly, seeing that Raph was okay.

"Leo. My name's Leo, and I'll be your waiter today."


	7. Chapter 7: Everytime We Touch

**A/N: Hey guys! Guess what, I'm alive after all, yaaay XD Seriously though I am so so very sorry it took me long to post this. School has been keeping me annoyingly busy, but hey, since you all were so patient I gave you a bit of reward chapter of sorts! That being said I suppose I should warn you guys that this fic is rated M for very specific reasons. That being said I hope you all enjoy this chapter and I will see you all again once I post the next one :3**

* * *

"_**I still hear your voice, when you sleep next to me.**_

_**I still feel your touch in my dream.**_

_**Forgive me my weakness, but I don't know why**_

_**Without you it's hard to survive.**_

_**'Cause everytime we touch, I get this feeling.**_

_**And everytime we kiss, I swear I could fly.**_

_**Can't you feel my heart beat fast, I want this to last.**_

_**Need you by my side."**_

_**~Cascada: "Everytime We Touch"**_

Leo bit his bottom lip, holding back a moan that was clawing its way up his throat, eyes tightly shut, his breaths staggering out through his nose. He didn't know why, but he felt like he had to be quiet, as if not wanting to wake someone. However the person above him, a man-definitely a man, holding him still as they left a trail of nips and kisses down his neck-was making it very, _very _difficult for him.

A gasp tore his mouth open as _those_ lips stopped at the juncture where his neck met his shoulder and began nipping and sucking at it. A small, needy, desperate whine following soon after, only to receive a deep and amused sounding chuckle for his trouble.

Oh god, he was going to go insane if this person kept this pace up for much longer!

"P-please," he mewled desperately. "P-please, R-ra-" Leo's words were lost as the tantalizing lips met his soft ones in a rough and demanding kiss, nipping along his bottom lip before slipping his tongue inside Leo's mouth. A large, calloused hand caressed his inner thigh, making him squirm and moan into the kiss.

Leo heard the man chuckle again and made a rather undignified noise as he pulled away from the kiss, the rough hand still seated on his thigh. "Don't worry fearless, I'll make yah feel good," the man's rough and gravelly voice promised, sending shivers down Leo's spine, and allowing him to only nod in response.

The man chuckled again and gripped Leo's cock firmly and trailed long, tortuously slow strokes, eliciting yet another desperate whine from the smaller male. Still the larger persisted, not even quickening his pace in the slightest as he cradled his lover's sacks.

"I love seeing you this way," the man whispered, suddenly beside Leo's ear, "writhing and squirming, so needy, so loose for once. You should be like this more often babe."

Leo could only shiver and grunt at the other man's words. Not that he was really paying attention to them of course. He was too busy grinding into those strong hands that had held him with such ease that only a lover who knew your body, and knew it _well, _could have. Leonardo was so focused on the sweet torture that he didn't even notice the large, thick, slick finger slide into him.

Eyes once again closing even tighter than they had been before, Leo let out a loud moan as his back arched, no longer worried about stealth or silence. Then it moved, they both did: the finger inside of him as well as the rugged palm over his achingly stiff cock. Already Leo was a nonsense-mumbling, panting mess. He wanted more, oh god he _**needed **_more!

As if reading his mind, the man slipped in yet another finger, earning a cry of pleasure from the smaller male. Before Leo knew it his hips were both thrusting themselves into the man's hand as well as riding his fingers, the small room filling with his ragged panting and loud moans.

Then something deep inside of him made him stop abruptly as a whole new wave of pleasure shot along his body. The man's fingers had brushed something, a small bundle of nerves. All too soon Leo was bucking again, begging the man to hit the same spot again, which he happily complied with. As the man rammed his fingers into Leo's prostate the hand on his cock jerked faster and harder. Leo bucked here and there as he got closer and closer to the edge before finally it became too much and he screamed as at long last and still far too soon he came.

Finally managing to open his eyes, he only received a very hazy image. The afterglow clouded his mind so completely that Leo was only able to make out the two distinct colors of green and red.

Leonardo woke to the sun shining brightly through his thin curtains. Wincing at the offending brightness he sluggishly attempts to shield his tired grey eyes

That was...a dream?

With a slightly disappointed sigh, Leo rubbed his forehead. He really should get to bed sooner than when he was. It felt as though he'd hadn't had any sleep at all! Glancing over at his electric clock's red numbers Leo sighed again. He may as well get up now anyway or he risked being late to school.

Sitting up to get out of bed, the raven haired teen jumped at the feeling of something cold...and sticky. Peering cautiously under his covers Leo groaned at what he saw. Looks like he enjoyed that dream a lot more than he thought…looks like there was no getting out of doing his laundry later tonight after all.

All the way across town Raphael was also looking under his covers and growled lowly: he was faring no better than poor Leonardo. Flopping back down onto his pillow Raph lay his arm over his eyes. He could still see it, if he really tried. The hazy blurs of the colors green and blue...he could even hear the loud cry as the boy under him came. What he couldn't understand was why that made him so happy! And he was. Raph remembered feeling incredibly happy when he heard the smaller male cumming because he was the one who made him do it…

Speaking of cumming, Raph growled again as he saw his blanket tenting once more. Huffing in frustration he cursed through gritted teeth:

"Damn it all!"

* * *

**A/N: Yeah, yeah I know, shorter chapter than usual, but look! SMUT! Anyway I would really like your guys' feed back on this, let me now how you think I did for my first ****_real_**** smut scene, and what I can do to be better. Again, I hope you guys enjoyed it and I should have the next chapter up sooner than it took me to post this one. Thank you all for understanding and being so patient with me :3.**


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